I have sucked big time this week. I haven’t eaten clean much at all…in fact other than the lettuce on my hamburger last night I didn’t have any vegetables at all yesterday. I’ve worked out a few times but I haven’t kept to my running training plan. I’ve just been very “off.” A few weeks ago I got the bright idea to take myself off of my meds for my seasonal affective disorder and that backfired big time. I’m back on one of them and I’ve been trying to wean myself off and it isn’t going so well. I don’t want to be on them but coming off of them has been difficult. And then sometimes I think, “Well, maybe I need them year round.”
I know that sometimes I sound like a broken record. Trust me, I’m as tired writing about it as you are reading about it. I commit to stay on track and then I gain a pound that week. It’s very frustrating and I have no one to blame for it but myself. I don’t know if it’s lack of motivation, lack of willpower or what. I don’t know why I get so close to my goals and then I just stop. Is it because I’m scared? Scared of failure? Scared of success? I don’t know. Maybe one day I’ll get myself all figured out!
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